Lustful Memoirs
By: Gina - gina@basic-nstynct.com
Chapter TwentyI spent the rest of the day lounging around the house. It was eerily quiet. Not a soul was around, not Johnny, not Justin and more important to me, not JC. I wondered where they had all disappeared to. The only person I saw the entire day was the housekeeper, she informed me that they had some business to attend to and that they wouldn’t be back until much later that evening. With that bit of knowledge and the whole house to myself, I decided to do a little investigative work. My first adventure found me down stairs in the studio. I was surrounded by buttons and knobs, none of which I understood but all of which JC had touched at one time. I lingered there looking around, opening and closing books, peering in cabinets. Not much about the place made any sense to me and nothing I found gave me any clues as to what was going on inside JC’s head. I knew what I was looking for before I even started my search. I wanted to get my hands on his book. It took me only three hours to discover it. Hidden underneath a pile of socks in the dresser in his room, were not one but two books, both with his distinctive handwriting on the cover. I pulled them out, quietly and closed the drawer. I made my way to Johnny’s office. I had noticed a Xerox machine there during one of my earlier expeditions. I hurriedly made copies of both books, praying that no one would come home. The copier finally stopped, I gathered the papers and the books and made my way down the corridor toward the gallery when I heard the front door open. My heart started racing as I imagined that it was JC and that he would find me holding his most private thoughts in my hands. I quickly flipped the copies over and stuffed the books between them, doing my best to hide them. I entered the gallery, my head quickly darting around looking to see who had come in. I breathed a sigh of relief when I noticed the fuscia color of Joey’s hair. He stopped me and we spent five minutes or so talking. He didn’t question anything and I doubt he even suspected. We departed and another sigh escaped from my lungs. It was time to get the books back where they belonged and get back to my room.
Moments later, I sat on the couch in my sitting room. The papers sprawled out on the table in front of me, the books safely returned to their rightful location. My hands shook as I picked up the first stack of paper. My heart pounded in my chest as I began my journey into the mind of the man that had captivated and compelled me. Hours past as I sat and read the first book. I learned the curve of his letters, the way the words slanted slightly to the right. His handwriting was unique, however clear and easily understood. No fancy decoration, just plain black letters standing out on the white sheet. The words captured his feelings more then the events surrounding him. Sometimes the pages were full of verse other times just simple solitary words. Other pages were filled with sentence upon sentence of feelings and emotions. It was clear to me that he used writing as a way of release, a way to work out the conflicts of his mind. Sometimes his words were full of anger and rage, other times sorrow and longing, the most touching words however came when he spoke of her, the love of his life. I was surprised to find that he knew of his friends feelings for her, of their dislike. However, he didn’t let that sway him. She was perfect through his eyes and according to him nothing would ever change that.
Combining that knowledge with what Justin had shared with me earlier, I wondered if he still felt that way. I turned over the last page of the first book and my body yawned, forcing me to realize my own fatigue. I had spent the entire day reading his words, I felt captured in his world. I longed to continue my journey, still not satisfied for I still did not know what she had done to cause him this pain. However, I couldn’t continue, my eyes were barely able to stay open and my body longed for rest. I gathered the papers together and put them in the desk drawer, being sure to lock it securely. As I laid my head on the pillow, I wondered what the rest of them had done that day. I hadn’t heard a word from any of them, except Joey. I wondered if JC was okay, I wondered if Justin had found him and taken care of him. I wondered what knowledge tomorrow’s reading would bring.